


Great at Crime-solving

by Gabi_type_creature



Category: Epithet Erased (Cartoon)
Genre: Canon-Typical Violence, Crime Fighting, F/M, Heist, Slow Burn, Slow To Update
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-01-21
Updated: 2020-02-07
Packaged: 2021-02-27 04:08:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,333
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22350850
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Gabi_type_creature/pseuds/Gabi_type_creature
Summary: After Ramsey gets sent to jail (which isn't as comfortable as he was promised), he quickly assumes that Officer King would want nothing more to do with him. And it certainly did seem that way at first.But when Percy is accused of a crime she didn't commit, she is (somewhat) prepared to do what it takes to clear her name.
Relationships: Percival "Percy" King & Ramsey Murdoch, Percival "Percy" King/Ramsey Murdoch
Comments: 22
Kudos: 94





	1. Locked up for Rat Crimes

**Author's Note:**

> Howdy folks! I'm a sucker for the cop and criminal pairing. We'll see how this goes, but constructive criticism is 100% encouraged!

"I'm being sent to Fengsel?!" Percy raised an eyebrow at Ramsey's sudden outburst, glancing over to his slouched form in the passenger seat before returning her focus to the road. "You've gotta be kidding me."

"I assure you I'm not, unfortunately." She responded. "However, if you would like me to put a positive spin on your situation-"

"I'm good thanks-"

"-this is one of the better outcomes, all things considered." Ramsey let out a short, sarcastic bark of a laugh despite himself.

"Really? Me being locked up in a max security prison for  _ fifteen years _ is one of the better outcomes." He wiggled in the seat, attempting to get into a more comfortable position- as comfortable as he could get when handcuffed to the armrest.

"Your sentence could've been much longer, for starters." Her radio crackled to life and she immediately switched it off. "I know this isn't ideal for you, Ramsey, but it was the best I could negotiate. With good behavior, I'm sure you'll be out in ten years rather than your designated fifteen."

"Either way I'll get to have my mid-life crisis while stuck in a cell!"

"I was under the impression you were in your early thirties."

"When I first got into this business, I realized I didn't know when the middle of my life was gonna be. I had the world's most feared bounty hunter on my tail for a while there, and a couple others besides. So… I just sort of decided to have an ongoing crisis."

Percy frowned. "If you want me to, I'd be glad to visit and help ward off the existential dread."

"Heh. Thanks." They rode in silence for a few minutes before Ramsey spoke again. "Here's a million dollar question for you, Officer: why?"

"... I'm afraid you'll have to elaborate."

"Why bother trying to get me less jail time? Hell, you could've just forgotten about the whole thing after you turned in the Amulet, left me to rot." He shrugged. "Wouldn't've blamed you if you had." Percy gripped the steering wheel a bit tighter as he continued to ramble. "Even could've tacked making false statements onto my list since I lied to you when we met. So… why'd you try to defend me? Why offer to visit?"

"You saved my life." She said simply. "It wouldn't have been right to just ignore that. And while you are a criminal of fairly high caliber, I believe you can change." She glanced over at him again, though a small smile decorated her face now. "I wasn't lying when I said your appraisal skills would be helpful on the right side of the law."

"Yeah? Well... good luck getting me to use 'em behind two feet of solid concrete and a three-story wall." He grumbled.

"Ah, I see you've done your research on this place."

"A little bit. Mostly just have eyes- er, eye." He pointed out the side window to the Fengsel Maximum Security Correctional Facility, in clear view thanks to the wide open field surrounding the building. The silence seemed to weigh down on them both when Percy suddenly pulled over to the side of the dirt road. 

"...You need to get in the back." She unbuckled and got out of the car, walking around to the passenger side.

"What?" He frowned as she opened the door and unlocked the cuff on the armrest.

"It's not common practice to let criminals sit up front in the cars we have a cage in. If you were sitting up with me when we arrived, I'm sure they would assume you coerced or threatened me." Ramsey was pulled out of the car, and before he could even think about escaping, his hands were cuffed behind his back.

"Oh come on Percy, you know they won't. Really now, does this face look threatening to you?" He offered a weak smile, but she didn't even glance up at him. "No, no I get it. Wouldn't want you to lose your job for fraternizing with the filth." 

"... I'm glad you understand." He sat down in the backseat and she buckled him in before walking back around to the front and starting the car.

The last few minutes until they reached the security station just outside the walls were spent in silence. Percy repeated her promise to visit him, and then handed him off to the guards.

Ramsey didn't particularly care anyway, or at least that's what he told himself. He'd probably be able to escape in a month or two anyway. Just had to lay low for a bit, and before he knew it he'd be far away in one of the other regions. Tundra perhaps, that was always nice in the summer.

* * *

So maybe he'd been in here six months without any progress towards getting out. It was fine. He'd never spent longer than a year in a prison… he'd never spent longer than six months in prison but it was fine! He just had to keep a lookout for any opportunities.

Right now might just be one of those opportunities.

He'd been woken up from what was admittedly a not-so restful nap and was currently being led to the visitation center. It was probably a mistake- Lord knows he didn't have anyone who would want to visit- but he could at least get a look. Nobody reasonable would try to escape from someplace with that many witnesses, which meant it probably had much lower security than the rest of the building. It wasn't his best plan, but it would have to do.

"Keep moving, Murdoch." The guard behind him shoved Ramsey forward, startling him out of his thoughts. "Wouldn't want to keep a lady waiting."

"Hang on, a lady?"

He laughed. "Yep. Seemed real eager to see you, said something about 'unfinished business'." Ramsey felt a shiver run up his spine as the puzzle pieces quickly clicked into place. Unfinished business was never good, and as far as he could remember there was only one person who would take the effort to track him here and settle a score.

Zora had come to finish the job.

"You- Y'know, I think I'm ok without my visit." He managed to stutter out, stopping in his tracks. The guard shoved him forward again, chuckling.

"I know how you feel bud, I'd hate to see my ex too."

"No, you don't understand. If she sees me, she will kill me." Ramsey tried to turn around but he was stopped by a hand on his eraser cuffs. "She will literally kill me, I can't go in there!"

The guard snorted and began to drag him along. "Not my problem Murdoch. We're just supposed to keep folks like you in here." They got to the door, and with one final push Ramsey stumbled into the room. "I'll be back in ten. Enjoy your talk!"

"Waitwaitwait-" The door shut and Ramsey squeezed his eyes closed before turning around. Maybe it would be better if he didn't see this one coming- hadn't he been able to do something last time that made him immune to Zora's attacks? He couldn't this time though, not with eraser cuffs. The room was silent for a good thirty seconds before he spoke, eyes still shut tight. "... If you're gonna kill me, can you just get it over with?"

"Why would I be here to kill you?" Came a surprised answer. "That would be detrimental to the point of my visit."


	2. Conversations with a Disgraced Cop

"-would be detrimental to the point of my visit." Ramsey blinked, and saw not Zora as he'd feared, but Percy. She was sitting at a counter with a sheet of glass separating the two sides of the room, except for a small circle of steel mesh. "We don't have much time to talk. Sit, please." 

He breathed a sigh of relief and slid into the seat. "Hey Percy. How's work been? I'm good, thanks for asking. Been locked up with no outside contact for six months but, y'know. I'm good!"

She tugged on the sleeve of her navy turtleneck. "I would like to apologize for not coming sooner. I was quite preoccupied for a number of reasons, but that doesn't excuse me from not holding to my promise until now." Ramsey waved a hand dismissively.

"Calm down, you're fine. Didn't actually expect you to show up in the first place. But since you're here, how are ya?"

Percy continued to pick at her sleeve. "I'm fine, thank you. The result of my last assignment has left me with an…" She swallowed and checked her watch before continuing. "An overabundance of free time. I assumed it would be as opportune a time as any to pay you a visit."

Ramsey frowned and sat up in the chair. Now that he was paying attention, there were a few details that bugged him. The Percy he remembered hadn't been so… twitchy, hadn't sounded this defeated. "Are you sure you're okay?" He asked. "Come on, where's the Officer King who fearlessly faced down a member of Bliss Ocean while-"

"Ms. King."

"Exqueeze me?"

Percy looked up and searched his face for a moment, then took a deep breath. "It's just Ms. King. I have been… temporarily removed from the force for the time being." She hung her head and resumed picking at her sleeve.

"Hang on, hang on, you got  _ fired _ ?" Ramsey sputtered.

"Not yet. I'm currently using some of my vacation hours, though I expect I will be removed once I return. Better to get used to the title change now."

"What're you gonna get fired for?"

"I was accused of some rather serious criminal activity, and an unfortunate portion of my coworkers are more than willing to find proof." Percy checked her watch again. "Can we please talk about something else for the few minutes left?"

"In a second." He leaned his elbows on the counter. "The whole thing doesn't make any sense, you're the most law-abiding person I've met. Pretty sure you'd report yourself for littering." She glanced at him, and for a split second he swore the corner of her mouth quirked upward. "Did you actually commit the crime?"

Percy shook her head. "No, but there is fairly damning evidence that points to me being the culprit."

"Bullshit. Whatever happened to 'innocent until proven guilty'?"

She shrugs. "Again, several of my coworkers are willing to found a case against me. Reporting unlawful behavior from my fellow officers doesn't exactly make friends."

"Huh." Ramsey frowns. "... If you want, I can try and help you get out of it? I do know a thing or two about avoiding convictions."

"You would be willing to do that?"

"Sure, why not?" He raised his hands, putting the eraser cuffs on display. "Don't got much else going on right now, remember? Bring what you know next time and we can talk it out." 

Relief spreads across Percy's face, and she breathes out a sigh. "Thank you Ramsey. It would mean a lot."

"Eh, it's really not that-"

The door behind him rattles open. "Time's up Murdoch. Back to your cell."

"Excuse me, we still have-" Percy checked her watch as she stood. "- approximately a minute and a half left."

The guard came up behind Ramsey and tilted the chair forward, forcing him to stand. "That's great lady. You must've missed the part where I wanted to stand outside the door for that much longer." 

Percy puts a hand to her hip and looks confused for a brief moment when her hand closes around thin air- like she's trying to draw a sword that isn't there. Ouch. "... I suppose I'll see you next week then, Ramsey." She says solemnly, almost as if willing the words into existence.

"Sure. See ya soon Perce." The guard ushers him out of the room- he really should have learned their name by now- and the door clangs shut as the two of them leave.

"You're still alive I see." They say, chuckling. "So much for the killer ex, huh?"

"Okay first of all, I never said she was my ex, and quite frankly I'm a little concerned about where you got that idea from. Second of all… it wasn't who I was expecting it to be anyway."

"Ah. It went well then?" Ramsey has to think about it for a moment, but he nods.

"Yeah… yeah, I'd say it went pretty well."

* * *

The week following the visit felt almost as long as the six months before it. With something to look forward to, even if the situation wasn't great for either of them, Ramsey found that time seemed to slow down to a crawl. And then the day came.

And then visiting hours came and went without so much as a stray blond hair in sight. Ramsey sat in his cell, idly shuffling a pack of cards to keep his hands busy. Percy didn't seem like the type to forget. Had something happened to her? Maybe she'd solved the problem on her own and had gotten right back to work. If only he could get out of here. Wasn't he able to do something about that? No, the cuffs. He'd have to-

A knock at the door caused him to jump, cards flying out of his hands. "Criminy, give a guy a heart attack why don'tcha?" The guard grinned- Carson was their name, as he'd finally learned three days ago.

"Sorry, I got some pretty exciting news for you though." They replied, holding out a sheet of paper. "Grab your stuff, you're being transferred out."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Constructive criticism is more than welcome! Next chapter is where things should start to pick up the pace ^_^


	3. A Surprisingly Successful Escape

"Transferred?" Ramsey's brain felt like it was moving in slow motion as he stood and took the paper from Carson. There was no letterhead, but it looked professional enough. He'd never heard of someone being moved out of a place like this- usually it was the other way around. "Why?"

They shrugged. "Beats me. This got faxed over from SJPD about an hour ago, and they got an officer waiting to take you now. Better get a move on." 

Shit. This was his chance to get out of here. If he could manage to convince whatever idiot they sent to unlock these stupid eraser cuffs, he'd be pretty much set. Just had to stay calm. Even he could manage that. "Uh, yeah! Yeah, doing that." He finally managed to squeak out. They smirked and unlocked the door, before directing him to yet another holding room. Sure enough, there was an officer wearing the Sweet Jazz uniform. 

It took Ramsey approximately half a second to realize that it's Percy, and another two seconds to question it. She was halfway leaning against the concrete wall, impatiently tapping the hilt of her sword. "Here's the prisoner you requested." They said. "Need anything else?"

"No, thank you." She pushed off the wall and stepped forward, still tapping in a rapid, near-frantic pattern. "Although I believe you need this pair of eraser cuffs back?"

Carson clicked their tongue and pulled a set of keys from their pocket, beginning to flip through them. "Right, right. You got your own to use? Some of these dirtbags can be pretty tricky." They found the right one and handed it to her.

"Not to worry." She unclipped a pair of cuffs from her belt and began to unlock the pair on Ramsey's wrists. "I usually keep a couple sets on my person when on duty."

"Good thinking." One cuff fell from his arm and she immediately locked the new pair on. He kept quiet- it seemed like the safe choice in this situation. The second eraser cuff fell from his wrist, and something that had been missing for ages clicked neatly back into its place.

His epithet. Goldbricker. He could remember his... Why was he able to remember his epithet with eraser cuffs on? Were the ones Percy put on him broken?

"Here you go." She handed the key and the working pair of cuffs back to them. Her words sounded wooden, flat, like she was reading off a script. "If there's nothing else, I'll be going."

"I do think that's about it. You have a good evening ma'am, drive safe." Ramsey barely took notice as she began directing him across the room, focusing instead on his hands. It took a second after being out of practice for so long, but soon enough a brilliant golden sheen began to cover his fingertips. Holy _shit_ , he had his epithet back!

"Stop that." Percy suddenly murmured behind him. "If you get caught wearing fakes we'll both be in trouble." She knew the cuffs weren't working… they hadn't been real to begin with. But if she knew, she wouldn't have let it happen on purpose, right? Even so, Ramsey let the gold fade away.

They were out in the parking lot now. When had they passed the guard station? Several things about this situation weren't adding up. Percy finally stopped at one police cruiser in particular that had several small dents in the trunk and the back passenger side- bullet marks. "Get in."

"Where are you taking me?"

She opened the door and gestured toward the backseat. "I will explain once we're on the road. The sooner we leave, the sooner I can tell you." Ramsey slid into the car seat without further complaint.

Something was definitely wrong.

"Okay, we’re out. You said you would explain, so explain." Ramsey demanded as soon as they passed through the gates. "Where are you taking me?" Percy kept her eyes on the road and said nothing. He unbuckled and scooted forward in the seat, gripping onto the mesh of the cage to steady himself. "Percy. What the hell is going on? Did you get your job back? Why am I being transferred? And what's with the fake eraser cuffs?"

"Not being transferred, breaking out. The fakes were to ward off suspicion." She didn't bother looking back. "And no, I haven't been reinstated at the moment. Now sit back and buckle up, you're being unsafe."

He sputtered incredulously. "Unsafe?! You just broke me out of jail to help you keep your job, I think I'm allowed to be a little -" She suddenly jerked the wheel to the right, causing Ramsey's face to slam into the wire cage as she pulled over. Percy pulled the key from the ignition and turned to face him, steely blue eyes rimmed with red. She looked exhausted.

Her voice was quiet when she spoke, but full of conviction. "There is a lot more going on here than my impending dismissal, Ramsey. Right now the priority is putting distance between us and Fengsel before they realize the ruse."

"You keep saying stuff but you haven't actually explained anything!"

"There’s too much to explain, it’s a complicated situation.”

“Try me. Here, I’ll even-” He sat back in the seat and buckled the seatbelt, a fairly clumsy task while wearing handcuffs. “See, no longer being unsafe. What’s so impossibly unbelievable that you can’t tell me?”

Percy sighed and dragged a gloved hand down her face, turning back to stare out the windshield. After a moment of heavy silence she finally spoke. “Here are the facts as I understand them. When the Arsene Amulet went back to the museum, the administrators requested assistance from the police to prevent another theft. About a month ago, I was assigned to keep guard on the last night of the exhibit. The amulet disappeared that night, and there is video evidence of my Epithet being used to take out security measures, in addition to DNA samples and my fingerprints being left in the shattered display case.”

Ramsey tilted his head curiously as he tried to process what she’d said. “But you didn’t do it, right?”

“... I don’t know.” Percy put the key in place, but didn’t turn it just yet. “One moment I was standing guard, and the next thing I remember the amulet was gone and a full hour had passed. The time in between is just- blank.”

She restarted the car.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Did you know that a person once escaped prison because someone sent a fax saying he should be let go? The fax was full of grammar and spelling errors, but it somehow worked.  
> Comments and constructive criticism are always welcome!


End file.
